《Yearning across horizons: The unseen embrace of longing》
Name：NOURIN HANEEF
Nationality: Pakistan
University：China University of Geosciences, Wuhan
Do you know the taste of longing?
Like drinking a bitter cup of coffee, then quietly shedding tears.
Do you know the taste of longing?
Like a cold winter night, the heart starts to snow.
Longing is an invisible emotion, unfathomable and unable to be expressed in words. It is the silent blessings and hopes in the heart. Longing is like the first croak of a frog in the summer, always unforgettable. Some say that longing is a kind of pain because it stems from the inability to see, thus causing sadness. But I don't think so. I believe that longing is also a kind of happiness, just like the lines in Wang Wei's poem, "I know my brothers have reached a high place, and only one of us is absent," the strong longing can be felt.
Rain is drizzling outside the window, and I have been sitting by the window, quietly listening to the sound of rain tapping on the leaves—pitter-patter, pitter-patter... one drop, two drops, three drops... so desolate yet so beautiful. In my hand, I tightly hold a photograph, and tears have already moistened my eyes.
China, I miss you!
Yes, I am missing China. I miss every day, every hour, every moment, every minute, and every second in China. Some memories are cherished, while some details are forgotten, as those two years have passed by in a flash. I miss that beautiful time; there are so many people I can't forget, and so many things I don't want to forget.
Yes, I am missing Wuhan! I miss my first familiar city. I still remember May 27, 2018, when I arrived in Wuhan with curiosity. Everything here felt so novel and intriguing! A new way of life, a new environment, a new school, new teachers, and new courses. I miss the route from Guanggu Square to Nanwang Mountain, from the East Gate to the bridge leading to the dormitories, and every corner of the campus.
Yes, I am missing my Chinese language classes! Now, I even miss the numerous assignments our teachers gave us every day. I miss the time when our teacher and classmates traveled together to Beijing, visiting the Forbidden City, and the magnificent Great Wall. On the Great Wall, we even took a group photo while holding hands. Every time I think about my study days in Wuhan, I am grateful to have met so many good teachers. I had passed HSK level five at that time, and the teacher strongly recommended that I take level six, but I was content with my current level and didn't want to register for the exam. However, the teacher didn't give up, urging me to study and encouraging me to progress. In the end, in a year and a half, I went from zero Chinese foundation to passing the HSK level six exams successfully! It was because of my HSK level six certificate that I could become a Chinese interpreter in a government department in Pakistan and get the dream job I had always wanted. The scene when Teacher Yin Siqin dragged me to learn level six is still vivid in my memory. It was such a warm and precious memory.
Yes, I am missing those small stalls along Lumo Road! I miss the aunt who sold shoes and clothes. I used to ask her, "Auntie, do you have long-sleeved shirt?" And she always replied, "No." But one day, as I passed by her shop without asking about the shirt, she saw me and shouted, "Hey, little girl, come here, come here." I went to her stall, and she gave me a long-sleeved shirt. I asked her, "Auntie, how much is this?" But she said, "It's free; you are my friend, and this is a gift for my 'Pakistani' good friend." I hugged her and couldn't express my excitement.
Yes, I am missing the lifestyle of convenience and abundance! I miss China's high-speed train journeys, reaching any distant place in just a few hours. I miss the bicycles available everywhere, unlocking with a simple scan of a QR code, taking me to wherever I wanted to go. I miss Alipay, making money transfers in the blink of an eye, so I didn't need to carry cash anywhere, just scan a QR code. I miss the convenience of WeChat, finding everything in moments on the Moments (social media feed). I miss my favorite Taobao, where I could simply add things to the shopping cart and find cheaper alternatives to the items found in the market by just taking a photo... If possible, I really want to bring all this technology to my country.
Great China, I miss you! I miss the Great Wall of Beijing, Shanghai’s Disneyland, Line 2 of Wuhan Metro, Shaolin Temple in Wudang shan, Sky city in Huangshi, Confucius Temple in Nanjing, West Lake in Hangzhou, may forth Square in Qingdao, and Golden Sand Beach in Dalian, as well as every place I visited with my first love.
The stars and constellations are always present in some corner of the universe, never parting. The moon is forever the guardian of the stars, never separated. Clouds will never leave the sky; grass will never leave the earth. However, we often have to part from each other, just like me and China.
The rain outside the window is still falling, and my tears keep flowing. I understand now, this feeling—longing. It is indescribable yet haunting; it cannot be shaken off because it has deeply rooted in your heart. It cannot be predicted; perhaps it will happen in the near future. Time cannot be rewound, and friendships will eventually end, but perhaps the only thing we can do is to cherish the memories of that old time and tell ourselves: Meeting China was so wonderful!
